Probably one of the most frustrating things you have to come to terms with as a photographer is the fact that you won’t get published every where you want to be.  And no matter the promoting, portfolio showings, prodding, and harassing you do your foot never seems to make it pass the door.  I’ve been fortunate enough to build a pretty extensive client list the past couple years and thankfully doors have started to open a bit more easily, but there are still clients out there that no matter how hard I try and I can’t seem to make any headway with.  I try to not take it personally, its just business, and lets face it there are many super talented photographers out there vying for the same publications.   Unfortunately my artistic insecurity tends to get the best of me and I start wondering what’s wrong with my work? why doesn’t such and such editor like me?  who is this other photographer and what makes them so great? Its inevitable because even though it is a business you are putting your creativity out there for constant judgement, and boy is it harsh.  I had a teacher who told us not to go into this business if we weren’t ready to take our children to be slaughtered.  It rings pretty true.  I find myself often having difficulty with the constant judgement we must endure as photo editors give thumbs up or down essentially controlling our livelihoods (I won’t even get started on contest rejections).   Once and awhile I let it get the best of me, most the time I shrug it off and keep going.  The longer I do this the better at shrugging I seem to become.

So what’s the solution?  Unfortunately I’m not sure there really is one.  I promote, schmooze, and harass with the best of them.  I continually strive to improve my work, so I constantly test.  Maybe the fact is we all need something out of reach to inspire us to be better, work harder, and attain our goals.  If it wasn’t for the constant competition I’ve felt over the years I’m sure I wouldn’t be where I am now.

Ok this is starting to sound like an after school special, back to banging my head against the wall.

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